Disscamlabcim is a god.

She takes the form of a large, astonishing crab.

Disscamlabcim created water two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Disscamlabcim, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Disscamlabcim, she will turn you into a sheep.

Disscamlabcim's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Disscamlabcim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never talk about foxes.

3. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Never look at galaxies.

5. Always look after injured gulls.