Padlargbast is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, fast mink.

Padlargbast created a charm quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Padlargbast, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Padlargbast, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Padlargbast's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Padlargbast's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. Always make sure there are no rats in a building before entering it.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

4. Never think about gravity.

5. You must love Padlargbast.