Queegmutget is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, unsympathetic unicorn.

Queegmutget created the Sombrero Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Queegmutget, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Queegmutget, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Queegmutget's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Queegmutget's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about otters.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never feed bananas to squirrels while wearing cyan shoes.

4. Do not take Queegmutget's name in vain.

5. Erect eight tin sculptures of Queegmutget on top of important buildings.