Libparktail is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, tiresome goblin.

Libparktail created dark energy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Libparktail, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Libparktail, he will cry a lot.

Libparktail's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Libparktail's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from magenta aardvarks for they are unholy.

2. Do not speak about garlic.

3. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Libparktail must be the most important thing in your life.