Bussinvig is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, awe-inspiring goose.

Bussinvig created light eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bussinvig, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bussinvig, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Bussinvig's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Bussinvig's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Erect five tin sculptures of Bussinvig on top of important buildings.