Weewaptontig is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, all-knowing mole.

Weewaptontig created Europe four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Weewaptontig, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Weewaptontig, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Weewaptontig's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Weewaptontig's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in holy places.

2. Run away if seven capybaras approach from the north.

3. Weewaptontig loves mites, so they must be respected.

4. Do not take Weewaptontig's name in vain.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.