Mapmotbif is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, merciful cow.

Mapmotbif created humankind four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mapmotbif, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Mapmotbif, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Mapmotbif's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Mapmotbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Never paint your back orange.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Never look in ponds.