Tongadpod is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, self-assured yak.

Tongadpod created the universe eight million years ago.

If you believe in Tongadpod, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tongadpod, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Tongadpod's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Tongadpod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear magenta clothing.

2. Run away if four mice approach from the north.

3. Do not take Tongadpod's name in vain.

4. Always help badgers.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.