Kemjarngam is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, unthinking cobra.

Kemjarngam created the Milkyway four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kemjarngam, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Kemjarngam, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Kemjarngam's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Kemjarngam's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a building before entering it.

3. Do not kill aardvarks.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sharks.

5. Always wear orange.