Stannarlbarnwadcat is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, awesome hydra.

Stannarlbarnwadcat created the Sun five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stannarlbarnwadcat, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Stannarlbarnwadcat, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Stannarlbarnwadcat's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Stannarlbarnwadcat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about galaxies.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Stannarlbarnwadcat loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.

5. Fast once a month.