Dunlarnpod is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unsympathetic wyvern.

Dunlarnpod created bats six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dunlarnpod, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Dunlarnpod, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Dunlarnpod's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Dunlarnpod's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Dunlarnpod.

2. Manatees are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always look after injured horses.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never talk about black holes.