Gidvigyimflat is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, intelligent giraffe.

Gidvigyimflat created Asia six million years ago.

If you believe in Gidvigyimflat, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gidvigyimflat, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Gidvigyimflat's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Gidvigyimflat's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Feed all hungry hamsters.

5. Never skip in the presence of great tits.