Bapabcet is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, effective faun.

Bapabcet created everything that exists nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bapabcet, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Bapabcet, she will turn you into a sheep.

Bapabcet's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Bapabcet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always help sick monkeys.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.