Gedwabmid Vollundut is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, all-knowing human.

Gedwabmid Vollundut created parasitic wasps eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gedwabmid Vollundut, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Gedwabmid Vollundut, it will not invite you to parties.

Gedwabmid Vollundut's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Gedwabmid Vollundut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Do not drink alcohol.