Yarpbinwikvonk is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, merciless wasp.

Yarpbinwikvonk created Europe five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarpbinwikvonk, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Yarpbinwikvonk, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Yarpbinwikvonk's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Yarpbinwikvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never write about asteroids.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never paint your neck indigo.

5. Do not chop down trees.