Gancibnab is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, thoughtless cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Gancibnab created silver three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gancibnab, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gancibnab, she will turn you into a puffin.

Gancibnab's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Gancibnab's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gancibnab.

2. Never hurt tortoises.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not kill turtles.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.