Gemflamged is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, strong crab.

Gemflamged created Mount Everest five million years ago.

If you believe in Gemflamged, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gemflamged, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Gemflamged's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Gemflamged's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Feed all hungry dolphins.

3. Never paint your head magenta.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never talk about gravity.