Dutcapdav Hugnatfas is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, sapient jaguar.

Dutcapdav Hugnatfas created a quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Dutcapdav Hugnatfas, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dutcapdav Hugnatfas, he will manifest in front of you.

Dutcapdav Hugnatfas' most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Dutcapdav Hugnatfas' Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Dutcapdav Hugnatfas.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Always help gulls in need.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never talk about comets.