Busxuchadvab is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, humorless hamster.

Busxuchadvab created Asia nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Busxuchadvab, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Busxuchadvab, she will not care.

Busxuchadvab's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Busxuchadvab's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear boots.

2. Sharks are not to be trusted.

3. Busxuchadvab must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Fast once a month.