Somfemomt is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, stupid dog.

Somfemomt created Asia seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Somfemomt, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Somfemomt, she will make you grow a tail.

Somfemomt's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Somfemomt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Somfemomt on top of all buildings.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. You must never eat rice.

5. Fast once a month.