Fitlunqueeg is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, compassionate wasp.

Fitlunqueeg created the Sombrero Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fitlunqueeg, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fitlunqueeg, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Fitlunqueeg's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Fitlunqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fitlunqueeg.

2. Fitlunqueeg loves birds, so they must be respected.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Always help sick otters.

5. Do not drink alcohol.