Tinkiktif is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, egotistical zebra.

Tinkiktif created oxygen seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tinkiktif, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Tinkiktif, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Tinkiktif's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Tinkiktif's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. You must never eat cucumbers.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Geese are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never write about amino acids.