Fonwantit Nuttlimkop Wabxucsit is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, two-faced clam.

Fonwantit Nuttlimkop Wabxucsit created tapeworms seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fonwantit Nuttlimkop Wabxucsit, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Fonwantit Nuttlimkop Wabxucsit, he will remove you from existence.

Fonwantit Nuttlimkop Wabxucsit's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Fonwantit Nuttlimkop Wabxucsit's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. Fonwantit Nuttlimkop Wabxucsit loves birds, so they must be respected.

3. Always help sick sheep.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate snails.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.