Quaggepnurt is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, all-knowing cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Quaggepnurt created Europe three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quaggepnurt, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Quaggepnurt, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Quaggepnurt's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Quaggepnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in holy places.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.

3. Never eat oranges.

4. You must love Quaggepnurt.

5. Erect a large tin sculpture of Quaggepnurt on top of all buildings.