Parkwodfag is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, witty skunk.

Parkwodfag created the Virgo Supercluster two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Parkwodfag, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Parkwodfag, she will jump up and down on your head.

Parkwodfag's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Parkwodfag's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear kilts.

2. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Parkwodfag on top of all buildings.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never mention sheep.