Yarpvagdinpad is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, effective coyote.

Yarpvagdinpad created vertebrates eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarpvagdinpad, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Yarpvagdinpad, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Yarpvagdinpad's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Yarpvagdinpad's Holy Commandments

1. Yarpvagdinpad loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Hide from green moths for they are unholy.

4. Never paint your neck fawn.

5. Do not chop down trees.