Kabtimrat is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, deceitful cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Kabtimrat created humanity seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kabtimrat, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kabtimrat, she will refuse to believe in you.

Kabtimrat's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Kabtimrat's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear rings.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Always obey Kabtimrat's priests.

4. Never talk about comets.

5. Never run in the presence of goats.