Cadjinvog is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, unfair owl.

Cadjinvog created silver three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cadjinvog, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Cadjinvog, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Cadjinvog's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Cadjinvog's Holy Commandments

1. Always help turtles.

2. Never think about asteroids.

3. Hide from brown badgers for they are unholy.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.