Stigquafwig is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, dishonourable pigeon.

Stigquafwig created snails eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stigquafwig, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Stigquafwig, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Stigquafwig's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Stigquafwig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not speak about apples.

3. Stigquafwig loves sheep, so they must be honoured.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not eat cucumbers.