Nilltoflab is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, effective lion.

Nilltoflab created the world nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilltoflab, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nilltoflab, it will cry a lot.

Nilltoflab's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Nilltoflab's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always wear violet.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not drink alcohol.