Wapfubgil is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unsympathetic clam.

Wapfubgil created an electron five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapfubgil, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Wapfubgil, it will jump up and down on your head.

Wapfubgil's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Wapfubgil's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not covet oxen.