Gilwikfly is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, boastful squirrel.

Gilwikfly created the universe six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gilwikfly, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gilwikfly, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Gilwikfly's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Gilwikfly's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in the presence of turtles.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never write about amino acids.