Shavfadmat is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, confident shark.

Shavfadmat created a charm quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Shavfadmat, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Shavfadmat, she will destroy your favourite star.

Shavfadmat's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Shavfadmat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never wear brown jumpers.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Do not bounce in public.

5. Never eat bark.