Hapdotart is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, emotional troll.

Hapdotart created a photon four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hapdotart, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Hapdotart, she will turn you into a tree.

Hapdotart's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Hapdotart's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hapdotart.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.