Wabstipfly is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, cheerful goblin.

Wabstipfly created light two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wabstipfly, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Wabstipfly, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Wabstipfly's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Wabstipfly's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always look after injured manatees.

5. Do not covet oxen.