Nartligquat is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, strong hedgehog.

Nartligquat created parasitic wasps nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nartligquat, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nartligquat, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Nartligquat's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Nartligquat's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick monkeys.

2. Do not speak about beans.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Never write about stars.

5. Pray towards the south.