Mum is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, temperamental horse.

Mum created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mum, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Mum, she will throw large rocks at you.

Mum's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Mum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt eagles.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not drink water in black rooms.

4. You must never eat garlic.

5. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.