Omtpitmip is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, dishonourable fly.

Omtpitmip created parasitic wasps three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Omtpitmip, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Omtpitmip, he will think nothing of it.

Omtpitmip's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Omtpitmip's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Run away from orange ants, for they are unholy.

3. Do not eat grapes.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.