Tailhitcem is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, sapient owl.

Tailhitcem created the Virgo Supercluster two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tailhitcem, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Tailhitcem, she will turn you into a snail.

Tailhitcem's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Tailhitcem's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Tailhitcem must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Worship no other gods but Tailhitcem.

4. Do not take Tailhitcem's name in vain.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.