Gutlenquam is a god.

He takes the form of a small, emotional parrot.

Gutlenquam created the planet Saturn seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gutlenquam, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gutlenquam, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Gutlenquam's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Gutlenquam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat melons.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never think about nebulae.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.