Butpog is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, unthinking wren.

Butpog created Africa seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Butpog, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Butpog, she will think nothing of it.

Butpog's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Butpog's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Never go into turquoise rooms.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Hide if three ants approach from the north.

5. Never skip in holy places.