Vadsogsaffeb is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, stupid armadillo.

Vadsogsaffeb created the planet Earth seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadsogsaffeb, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Vadsogsaffeb, he will turn you into a mole.

Vadsogsaffeb's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Vadsogsaffeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near gulls.

2. Worship no other gods but Vadsogsaffeb.

3. Put Vadsogsaffeb first in all things.

4. Never paint your back orange.

5. Hide if eight shrews approach from the north.