Stafgenfeb is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, ill-tempered tortoise.

Stafgenfeb created a quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Stafgenfeb, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Stafgenfeb, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Stafgenfeb's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Stafgenfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Retreat if nine monkeys approach from the south.

3. Run away if six moths approach from the north.

4. Do not take Stafgenfeb's name in vain.

5. Never wear ear rings.