Gatbastgab is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, moody chicken.

Gatbastgab created the Milkyway seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gatbastgab, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gatbastgab, he will refuse to believe in you.

Gatbastgab's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Gatbastgab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat bananas.

2. Never write about comets.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never mention manatees.

5. Do not drink alcohol.