Fumbapquagkab is a god.
She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, pitiless
fly.
Fumbapquagkab created carbon eighteen thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Fumbapquagkab, she will give you lots of grapes.
If you do not believe in
Fumbapquagkab, she will turn you into a hamster.
Fumbapquagkab's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.
Fumbapquagkab's Holy Commandments1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.
2. Do not cook food in pots.
3. Never look at moons.
4. Always treat bats with great respect.
5. Never paint your back cyan.