Fatlarnnutt is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, unjust mongoose.

Fatlarnnutt created a bottom quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fatlarnnutt, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Fatlarnnutt, he will turn you into a tree.

Fatlarnnutt's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Fatlarnnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Always help dolphins.