Bissmif is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, duplicitous dugong.

Bissmif created the Black Eye Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bissmif, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bissmif, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bissmif's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Bissmif's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear kilts.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not jump in public.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always help sick bats.