Bephotyakvad is a god.

She takes the form of a large, unthinking salamander.

Bephotyakvad created tapeworms eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Bephotyakvad, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Bephotyakvad, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Bephotyakvad's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Bephotyakvad's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at moons.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Run away if three cats approach from the west.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Retreat if nine badgers approach from the south.