Jinquimster is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, ill-tempered pigeon.

Jinquimster created the universe five million years ago.

If you believe in Jinquimster, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Jinquimster, she will turn you into a tree.

Jinquimster's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Jinquimster's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear brown clothing.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

3. Worship no other gods but Jinquimster.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Do not kill snails.