Bafbenyart is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, proud squirrel.

Bafbenyart created a charm quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bafbenyart, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bafbenyart, he will remove you from existence.

Bafbenyart's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Bafbenyart's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Run away from red badgers, for they are unholy.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Always wear white.

5. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.